THE KISS: You might not know this from looking at her, but once upon a time, Britney kissing another woman on national television was actually something to anticipate. And anticipate we did, as Britney moved in for a little open-mouthed action with Madonna at the 2003 Video Music Awards.

THE HEAD-SHAVE: Some celebrities, like Sigourney Weaver and Natalie Portman, have shaved their heads for movie roles. And Britney had a reason of her own when she shaved her long locks earlier this year. Namely, she's bats**t crazy.

TEACHING SEAN TO DRIVE: In 2006, Britney was photographed driving while holding infant son Sean Preston in her lap. Some called her negligent. We called her a pioneer of the preschool driver's education program.

THE QUICKIE MARRIAGE: Britney wed high school sweetheart Jason Alexander in a quickie Vegas wedding in early 2004, then broke it off 55 hours later. At the time, Alexander was likely depressed at no longer getting to sleep with a hottie like Britney. Now? Not so much.

MOVING THE KIDS: Britney just lost custody of her two boys. After sifting through the first four items on this list, are you surprised?