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Sure, you could learn French, run marathons and give money to charity, but why go to all that effort when you can just pretend to do all those things?

That's the premise of “Faking It: How to Seem Like a Better Person Without Actually Improving Yourself” (Dutton, $19.95). The new book from the writers of collegehumor.com offers a how-to guide using your knowledge of African politics and your love of opera to impress your friends, co-workers and that hot Starbucks barista you've been eyeing.

Is it a real self-help book or just a joke?

“I think it has a lot of legitimate useful advice in it, but it is also meant to be funny,” said Ethan Trex, co-author of the book along with Amir Blumenfeld and Neel Shah. “Most of it is tried and true. Or maybe it's not true, but it's tried. And it works.”

DO ONE THING AND DO IT WELL
Learn to play one song on the piano or guitar really well; when asked for an encore, say you could play all night if you have to, but the party isn't about you.
 
THE OL' SWITCHEROO
Refill bottles of top-shelf liquor with cheaper stuff so you look like a connoisseur without spending like one.
 
GRAY MATTERS
Don't understand a painting at an art museum? Call the brushwork “brave” or the work “playful” (“a great vague term for anything that's not overwhelmingly depressing”).

HATE IT WITH A PASSION
Be dismissive to hide your ignorance of a topic. You can always call a band “derivative,” a sports team “coached up” and art “reactionary.” As the authors put it, “people perceive that it takes some deeper understanding and analysis of something to dislike it.”

Jessica Belasco | Contributor