By MATTHEW PERPETUA

Pop songs are constantly bossing us around.

Even when they are commanding us to act on our own desires, their demands can seem a bit off-putting. For example, ''Everybody dance now!'' can certainly sound like a threat if you hear it in the wrong mood.

It's just the same when we hear songs that tell us not to do something, especially when they are trying to talk us out of our own passions. Each of the selections in this week's column is trying to convince us not to be self-destructive, either by supplying common sense advice, or self-serving criticism.

Jarvis Cocker ''Don't Let Him Waste Your Time'' (Rough Trade)

Britpop icon Jarvis Cocker originally wrote ''Don't Let Him Waste Your Time'' for Nancy Sinatra, and though her recording is lovely and fine, it doesn't quite measure up to his own version from his debut solo album. Sinatra's take is gentle and sweet, but sung with a bit of emotional distance, whereas Cocker's seethes with barely contained jealousy and passive-aggression as he attempts to dissuade a woman from her commitment to another man. The lyrics are knowingly disingenuous, and Cocker plays the role of the selfish cad without making the character too smug and unsympathetic. Think of it as being a more pro-active version of Joe Jackson's classic pop single ''Is She Really Going Out With Him?''

Download the song here: http://tinyurl.com/33xgxu

Buy it here: http://tinyurl.com/395sw7

Wooden Wand and the Vanishing Voice ''Don't Love The Liar'' (5 Rue Christine)

''Don't Love The Liar'' is as straightforward and undeniably true as any bit of advice is likely to be, but as most anyone with even a bit of experience in love and friendship can attest, it's terribly difficult to follow it, especially when you love someone and don't want to believe that they are a total creep. Wooden Wand and the Vanishing Voice's song is intense, bleak and spooky. The track basically sounds as if they are trying to scare the listener straight, though I can't imagine it'll ever be enough to keep anyone from ever falling for any of this world's many dishonest jerks.

Download the song here: http://tinyurl.com/297xoa

Buy it here: http://tinyurl.com/2lezef

They Must Be Russians ''Don't Try To Cure Yourself'' (Crippled Dick Hot Wax)

This oddity from Crippled Dick Hot Wax's recent British punk singles compilation 7'' Up is a deadpan public service announcement about venereal disease set to a track that alternates between mid-tempo verses and revved-up instrumental choruses. The song might be a lame novelty if not for the genuinely funny comedic timing of its vocalists -- a dry lead singer narrates the song like a bored science teacher, and an earnest background singer is charged with punctuating the spoken bits with melodic interjections like ''Yeah, yeah, the pubic hairs!'' Strangely, when they get around to imploring us to seek professional help rather than to attempt self-medication at the end, it's somehow seems very sensible and wise instead of ridiculous. Even after all the snark and irony, the song manages to retain a helpful message.

Download the song here: http://tinyurl.com/ysptxy

Buy it here: http://tinyurl.com/2neeeh

Matthew Perpetua is the maestro behind http://www.fluxblog.org